Tough Decisions

Well, Mama's not making a lot of improvement.

The first antibiotic she was on seemed to make her crazy symptoms worse. So the doc changed it to one that had worked before — or maybe it just seemed to since she got another UTI so soon. She almost seemed she might stop the crazy talk, but it just led to not talking at all. She wouldn't even eat or drink anything Thursday. Friday she ate as usual, & drank without trying to bite the straw in half; but was still talking crazy. I don't know which is better. We did have a short and totally sane conversation this evening though. It was the first in a long time.

But I've had to make a tough decision: hospice care. Our situation won't change in the day to day around here. There are only two advantages I can see:

1] They will have a nurse come out to check as little or as much as we want.

2] If it ever comes time that her health or mental state doesn't allow her to remain here with us, she'll be in a hospice facility instead of a nursing home.

So tomorrow I make that call. It doesn't mean that I've given up; it just means that I have to be prepared for anything and not be floundering when that time comes. All this makes me think long and hard about what will happen to me when I get older. Maybe that's a good thing about Big Daddy being 10 years younger than me so he can take care of me when I'm older and more decrepit.